Sticking it To the Telemarketers

Blogger Grobstein wrote a post a while back about clever ways he likes to deal with telemarketers. I'm not personally in favor of just hanging up, or being rude, mostly out of pity for the poor soul whose job it is to call people's houses unsolicited. I am in favor of clever solutions and ways to turn the situation into entertainment. I think this would be a good opportunity to share my favorite methods of blowing off telemarketers:

Ask them to loan you money. If they decline, try to get them to loan you whatever they're selling to exchange for money.

Act as if you know they're a friend or a relative pretending to be a telemarketer, "I know it's you Jim. Ha ha. Very funny, you can stop pretending now."

Act very old and lonely and ask them to be your friend.

Tell them that you only pay for things with sex.

Tell them that whoever they asked for on the phone is dead, then go into a whole bereavement routine and try to elicit sympathy.

Tell them you need 911 and ask them to call for you.

That's all I can think of for the moment, and I know some of those are fairly random. If anyone has any other favorite methods, don't hesitate to post them in the comments section!

Update: Note that I've never actually used any of these...

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